Perfectionism eats away self-esteem

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Does what could be a simple task rob you of your plans?

​Perfectionism is linked to all-or-nothing thinking. Anything less than perfect is not an option. It is a way of striving to be the best we can be, often praised and valued in our society. In small amounts, it can push us to achieve great things and deliver high-quality work. However, when perfectionism is instilled in us it can lead to anxiety and low self-esteem because of a fear of failing. 

 Growing up did you ever feel you were pushed to do better, did you feel like you let people down when you didn't get something absolutely right maybe you still carry a belief that you never be good enough at that thing so why attempt it - you just know you’ll be a laughing stock. The messages we receive in childhood can take many forms. For example, a parent might constantly push their child to achieve perfect grades or excel in a particular sport.

Those who are perfectionists can be seen putting themselves down. These self-defeating attitudes can make it difficult for us to be around, if this feels tough imagine being inside our head. We created an ideal outcome in reality this is often not manageable or sometimes even possible.


I can support you to swap perfect for good enough, here's where we might start

​Are we under budgeting?

I'm not talking about money here. I mean for the difficulties in achieving this. Are we being somewhat reckless, has there been an accurate budget given for the time and effort.
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Have we recognised the difficulty of what we are trying to achieve?

If we know from the off that what we are trying to achieve is exceptionally difficult there is less panic, if we know that progress is likely to be slower and possibly take more than one attempt to get the outcome we want. 

Are we taking it as a personal dig?

If we see not achieving something as a personal dig, we might someone else could do this thing perfectly, and that it is a lack of skill on our part meaning we can't. This could be dependant on lots of factors such as part experience for example. We don’t see all of the information and how they got there.

Remember, be gentle with yourself overcoming perfectionism is a process, not an event. Be patient with yourself. 

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